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Jennifer Goldman-Wetzler PhD
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Optimal Outcomes: Free Yourself from Conflict at Work, at Home, and in Life Hardcover – February 25, 2020

4.7 4.7 out of 5 stars 66 ratings
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An award-winning conflict consultant offers a new path to take when agreement and collaboration seem impossible, and teaches us that when conflict resolution fails, we can achieve freedom instead—even without others’ cooperation.

A founding CEO and his top salesperson are engaged in a heated clash over her compensation package.

A mother and daughter are locked in a nasty cycle of blame and attack.

A high-profile executive team is struggling with aggressive political infighting.

In all these cases, every effort to talk it out has been unsuccessful.

Where can you turn when your attempts to resolve conflict fail? Most approaches emphasize collaboration. You are supposed to sit down, calmly talk through your differences, and find a solution. But what if nothing seems to work, no matter what you do?

When situations resist resolution, the Optimal Outcomes Method teaches us conflict freedom.

This innovative method, based on Dr. Jennifer Goldman-Wetzler’s training at the Program on Negotiation at Harvard Law School, two decades as a consultant to Fortune 500 and high-growth CEOs and senior teams, grassroots work with Middle East leaders, US government-funded research on terrorism, and her popular course at Columbia University,Optimal Outcomesreveals eight groundbreaking practices proven to help people everywhere free themselves from conflict.

With inspiring stories from clients, students, and Dr. Goldman-Wetzler’s own life lighting the way, you’ll learn to observe complex situations with clarity, access your shadow values (things you really care about but have been unwilling to admit), and take bold, simple, surprising action.

Optimal Outcomes blends mindfulness, Jungianpsychology, and practical, step-by-step advice to free anyone from seemingly impossible conflict. Applying the practices, you’ll reach your Optimal Outcome—which may be vastly different from what you originally imagined, but more satisfying than you ever dreamed possible.

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  1. Print length
    240 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publisher
    Harper Business
  4. Publication date
    February 25, 2020
  5. Dimensions
    6 x 0.85 x 9 inches
  6. ISBN-10
    0062893653
  7. ISBN-13
    978-0062893659
  8. See all details
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Editorial Reviews

Review

“Conflict is an inevitable part of life, but it isn’t an inevitable source of misery. This hands-on book is full of reflection exercises to help you spot the hidden patterns in your regular clashes and learn how to defuse them.”  — Adam Grant, New York Times bestselling author of Originals and Give and Take, and host of the chart-topping TED podcast WorkLife

“Every once in a while, you'll encounter a book and wish everyone you know would read it. This is one of those rare books. It will help you reset the way you think about conflict and help you become more productive, mindful and kind along the way.” — Seth Godin, author of This is Marketing

“I’ve watched Jennifer work her magic with global leaders. Now she has captured that wisdom in this book. If you read one business book this year, make it Optimal Outcomes.” — Jeffrey C. Walker, Chairman of New Profit, former Vice Chairman of JPMorgan Chase & Co., and coauthor of The Generosity Network

“Not every conflict can be solved by negotiation. With engaging real-world examples and a proven method, Optimal Outcomes will transform how individuals and organizations approach conflicts of all kinds.” — Doug Stone and Sheila Heen, coauthors of the New York Times bestseller Difficult Conversations

“Optimal Outcomes is a cool drink of water in a world over-heated by conflict. With clarity and heart-filled insight gained from decades of caring practice, Jennifer Goldman-Wetzler leads us down the path to conflict freedom, liberating us from the painful belief that conflicts are intractable.” — Jerry Colonna, author of Reboot: Leadership and the Art of Growing Up and CEO, Reboot.io

"A brilliantly written guide for the 21st century leader. Jennifer Goldman-Wetzler will change how you think about conflict and complexity, and more importantly, how you lead through it.” — Sharon Fay, Co-Head of Equities, AllianceBernstein 

“Brimming with science-backed good advice, Optimal Outcomes will free you from the hidden patterns and shadow values that make conflict so difficult to resolve. A liberating approach that can change your life.” — Daniel L. Shapiro, Ph.D., Director, Harvard International Negotiation Program and author of Negotiating the Nonnegotiable 

“An important, unique approach to dealing with conflict, even when one side may not be amenable. Highly recommended for anyone interested in applying a user-friendly methodology in their personal and professional interactions.”  — Joshua Sinai, Ph.D., counterterrorism expert, Book Reviews Editor, Perspectives on Terrorism and columnist, The Washington Times 

“Optimal Outcomes provides a simple but powerful method for dealing with breakdowns that seem unresolvable.” — Erica Ariel Fox, President, Mobius Executive Leadership and author of the New York Times bestseller Winning from Within

“Framed with…a kind but no-nonsense tone, this succinct and focused guide is a boon to anyone looking to turn arguments into negotiations and negotiations into agreement.” — Publishers Weekly

About the Author

Dr. Jennifer Goldman-Wetzler is the founder and CEO of Alignment Strategies Group, the premier New York–based consulting firm that counsels CEOs and executive teams on how to optimize organizational health and growth. As a keynote speaker at Fortune 500 companies, public institutions and innovative, fast-growing startups, she inspires audiences of all kinds, including those at Google, Harvard and TEDx, and in her popular course at Columbia. A former counterterrorism research fellow with the US Department of Homeland Security, she is a graduate of Tufts University and holds a Ph.D. in Social-Organizational Psychology from Columbia University.

Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Harper Business (February 25, 2020)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 240 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0062893653
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0062893659
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 13.7 ounces
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 6 x 0.85 x 9 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.7 4.7 out of 5 stars 66 ratings

About the author

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Jennifer Goldman-Wetzler PhD

Jennifer Goldman-Wetzler PhD

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Dr. Jennifer Goldman-Wetzler, a leading expert on conflict and organizational psychology, is founder and CEO of Alignment Strategies Group. For two decades, she has advised senior leaders at global corporations in a wide range of industries as well as at large non-profit and governmental institutions.

In the corporate arena, Jennifer counsels CEOs and their teams on how to achieve optimal organizational health and growth, specializing in innovative technology, healthcare, and financial and professional services companies. She has served clients including: CSC, IBM, Intel, athenahealth, Novartis, Oscar Health Insurance, Oxeon, Roche, Barclays, GE Capital, Moody’s, Cornerstone Research, Lexis Nexis, Navigant, and KPMG.

In the public sector, she helps leaders and their teams optimize organizational impact at institutions including: Jazz at Lincoln Center, the New York City Economic Development Corporation, The New School, Oxfam America, and the United Nations.

As a keynote speaker, Jennifer inspires audiences of all kinds, spanning Google and TEDx, to Harvard and Columbia University, where she serves as Adjunct Professor in the Department of Organization and Leadership, and teaches a popular course on conflict freedom. She also coaches global business and government leaders in the Executive Education Program at Columbia Business School.

Earlier in her career, she was Director of Negotiation Programs at Mediation Works Incorporated, and a facilitator at the Program on Negotiation at Harvard Law School.

Jennifer's new book, OPTIMAL OUTCOMES: Free Yourself from Conflict at Work, at Home, and in Life will be published by HarperBusiness on February 25, 2020. She has also written the book Emotions in Long-term Conflict (2014) as well as articles and chapters in such outlets as Chief Learning Officer magazine, International Journal of Conflict Management, and The Handbook of Conflict Resolution.

She received her B.A. with honors from Tufts University and holds a Ph.D. in Social-Organizational Psychology from Columbia University.

Customer reviews

4.7 out of 5 stars
4.7 out of 5
66 global ratings
If You're "Conflicted" About What Book You Should Read Next...Worry No More: This is The One!
5 Stars
If You're "Conflicted" About What Book You Should Read Next...Worry No More: This is The One!
We all face some degree of conflict in our lives, pretty much every single day. (Especially those of us who live here in NYC...where it can sometimes seem more like every single minute! :) Whether it's at work or at home -- or even internally within our own minds -- every single relationship brings with it the potential for conflict. In her amazing and life-transforming first book, Optimal Outcomes, the brilliant author, professor, and psychologist, Jennifer Goldman-Wetzler, PhD, generously shares with us her secrets for success. Through a mix of practical tools, tips, and techniques coupled with engaging storytelling and powerful personal examples, Optimal Outcomes is a must-read for anyone who wants to break unproductive patterns and discover a path to better results and greater happiness.
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Top reviews from the United States

ROY617
5.0 out of 5 stars Clear and actionable
Reviewed in the United States on March 12, 2020
Verified Purchase
This book is exceedingly clear and easy to read, provides a simple model for thinking about persistent conflicts, and offers a series of practices that are immediately actionable. They may be hard to master, but they have been illuminating my day-to-day interactions with certain family members that can sometimes be challenging, have helped me bring my attention to what's going on in me and in the dynamic, and helped me see and take some concrete actions to disrupt the dynamic.

I particularly like the cycle and path metaphors, which provide a clear frame for seeing and reclaiming my power in these dynamics.

One of the practices that I chose to start with, involves planning and doing small, pattern breaking actions, to build the path out of the cycle. I've been finding that very helpful particularly with one family member, though not at all easy.
2 people found this helpful
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CB
5.0 out of 5 stars Research & first hand experience, a great combo for dealing w/conflict
Reviewed in the United States on April 29, 2020
Verified Purchase
I appreciate how this book drew on the author's first hand experience to bring to life different types of conflict and ways to manage through them. The vignettes brought color and realism to a topic that can sometimes be hard to pin down. This approach of providing practical advice was further supported by research that provided deeper understanding of the concepts as well as credibility. Conflict mapping, shadow values and designing pattern breaking paths are just a few of the approaches that I found valuable. Great read.
One person found this helpful
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Craig Clermont
5.0 out of 5 stars Powerful way to improve your life - personally and in business
Reviewed in the United States on July 27, 2020
Verified Purchase
When making a big decision, such as buying a home or business, there are strategies that are much better than basic 'pro/con' lists.

Improving how you interact with others during a big decision - especially if arguments crop up regularly - is another powerful way to improve a decision or negotiation.

Usually we need the blessing of a spouse or business partner, so taking some time to improve the way you handle conflict can go a long way to produce a quality decision - and how much support you get afterward.

This new book provides great tips on self-diagnosing yourself to see where you have challenges dealing with conflict, so you can then fix yourself BEFORE making the joint decision.

It is a profound book to help with any joint contentious negotiation with a family member, colleague or partner! 😊

Craig
2 people found this helpful
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Jeff Lippincott
4.0 out of 5 stars Basically an anger management book packaged as a conflict resolution book!
Reviewed in the United States on February 27, 2020
I liked it, thus the 4-star rating. The author is a PhD educated as a social psychologist. Her doctorate is from Columbia University where she regularly offers a 3-day workshop on which this book's content is based. Her consulting practice is called Alignment Strategies Group, and the method of conflict resolution she promotes in her work she calls Optimal Outcomes Method (OOM). Clearly the book is a marketing piece for her consulting gig. The funny thing is that after you read the book you probably don't need to hire her since I doubt she can add much to what she says in the book which is well-written and covers its subject matter.

There is a 21-page introduction to this 197-page book. It does a wonderful job of telling the reader what the book is going to tell you. When I was in middle school as a kid my father tried to teach me how to write. He told me that you are supposed to tell the reader what you are going to tell them three times. Once in the introduction, then again in the main body, and lastly in a conclusion. That way the reader cannot put the writing down without definitely knowing what the message is. This book does not have a conclusion. One weakness. But in the author's defense, she does a really nice job with her introduction, and the main body is consistent with what she says in her intro.

The author wants to package what she has to say as a book about conflict resolution. She claims it does a better or more thorough job than other books on the subject. She claims that there are two approaches to conflict resolution: one winner, or everybody wins. Said another way, there's the win paradigm and there's the collaborative paradigm. Most conflict resolution authors talk in terms of the win paradigm. And this author's a fan of the collaborative paradigm.

I don't really see much of a difference between the two paradigms. After reading this book the real difference between the paradigms is not concessions (or lack thereof). But instead is whether the parties can manage their anger and/or resentment that causes the conflict in the first place. There have been many books written in the past about anger management and how to curb your emotions so you can move on. That is what this book is really about. If you can curb your emotions, then you can ultimately settle. The book is definitely worth a read. It might not have all the answers. But it'll give you something to think about and probably be helpful to you in life. 4 stars!
6 people found this helpful
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uids
5.0 out of 5 stars What a find if you’re in a bind !
Reviewed in the United States on March 19, 2020
Verified Purchase
What a helpful, well-written book. The author gives a clear framework for dealing with difficult relationships. Her examples from her personal life as well as her clients are perfect for explaining the steps we all need to go through to work through conflict. Helpful for intractable conflicts with co-workers, family and friends. Definitely worth reading.
3 people found this helpful
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W. Smith
5.0 out of 5 stars We all need this book to live our best life
Reviewed in the United States on March 18, 2020
Verified Purchase
We all face tensions. Goldman helps us see the underlying and persistent conflicts that drive these tensions, and provides a really clear and specific framework of how we can address those underlying issues - fixing the underlying causes, not the symptoms. I appreciated the multiple, specific examples to help ground these ideas and see the potential for success. This is a book with very practical value in our work and in personal lives.
One person found this helpful
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Alex
5.0 out of 5 stars A practical toolkit for transcending even the toughest conflicts in your work and in your life
Reviewed in the United States on March 3, 2020
Verified Purchase
This book is written in a clear and practical with real world examples--it's not just about conflict resolution, it's about breaking free of the entire situation and getting to an entirely better place. And what's especially helpful is that if you've always heard "it takes two to tango" this book will give you tools that work even if you're the only one using them. We all need to get better at what this book teaches!
3 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

Christine brown-quinn
4.0 out of 5 stars How to break out of your conflict loop
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on October 27, 2020
Verified Purchase
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 This book offers a fresh perspective on the topic of conflict resolution. Easy to follow summaries at the end of each chapter help the reader follow through on the relevant learnings.

Christine Brown-Quinn
Amazon #1 Best Selling Author in Business & Finance
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